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RECALLING THE KING OF NIGERIAN ROADS

As I boarded the vehicle to hit the airport, after a heated holiday in Nigeria (I mean this literally), I somehow managed to notice the brand of car I was about to ride. But when we hit the Third Mainland Bridge I became conscious again of all the cars zooming past our crawling automobile. I was a bit taken aback to see that eight out of the first ten cars I counted were of the same brand as the one I was in. I kept counting to prove me wrong on which car maker dominated the Nigerian market. I only rested my case when I had probably counted like a hundred of them.

Toyota clearly is the brand that rules the Nigerian car market, and if my zooming research is anything to go by, I would easily conclude that 80% of the cars on Nigerian roads are of the Toyota brand. Do I have any beef with that? Certainly not! Toyotas are cheap, easily maintained, and Nigerians love their Toyota models, especially their Prados, Landcruisers, Lexus, 4Runners, Avensis, Highlanders, Rav4s, Camrys, Corollas, Yaris, Avalons…should I continue? These cars are the dominating models featured on the auto-fashion shows on our roads. If it were possible, there would be Toyota coup in the country.

Toyota prides itself in stating that its guiding principle is “contributing to the development of a prosperous society through the manufacture of automobiles”. Obviously we may not question that at this juncture until certain questions on key indicators are asked. My main concern is with the recent developments with the car makers based in Japan on the recall of their vehicles in the US, Europe, and China. While there is probably a bigger market in these locations than in Africa, especially with the environmentally friendly Prius model, I am hoping that there will be an immediate recall to all affected vehicles in Africa, especially Nigeria.
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BUILDING ON THE STRENGTH OF THE TIME

If you look or listen around, you will feel a sudden surge in the concerns we all have for our country. Most important is that young Nigerians all over are really building interest in the Nigerian project and there seems to be an increasing passion on experiencing due changes in all facet of the nation’s existence.  Every time you raise national issues in a discussion, everyone has a comment to make, and interestingly, such commentaries are loaded with intelligent submissions.

Not too long ago I was talking with a few young Nigerians who have barely lived in the country. As usual the subject of Nigeria came up, especially as we have been recently characterized as a rudderless ship floating nowhere. I was astonished at the extent to which these young ones have grown more competent in understanding the complexities of the society and having their minds congealed with high opinions on what’s going on and how this can be corrected. I find this to be fascinating because only a few years ago, young people were barely interested with what was going on in the country, especially with folks living without the country.

Today, everything that speaks Nigeria is basically an attempt at recreating an image for the country. From our entertainers, educators, researchers, scientists, and even social commentators, there is a word about Nigeria on everyone’s lip. On the lighter side (or maybe more serious than I think), we have suddenly become so internationally popular for differing reasons. From spinning adverts to freaky movies and to even underwear knockouts on a fateful Christmas day, Nigeria has had more than the usual dose of notoriety, which has evoked a plethora of commentaries, even from those who aforetime least mattered in the domain of public discourse.  Everyone is throwing something into this seething pot and hoping that we will eat the produce thereof and be glad.

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FIVE THINGS TO DO TO THIS BEAUTIFUL WOMAN

Girl-Nigeria-FlagAfter accepting the romantic advances of this beautiful bride for the past thirty years of my life, and accepting the privileges she has granted me, I have found that my responses to her must of necessity follow certain steps. These steps are not sacrosanct, but are merely the products of the winding maze she has carved out of her history, and the unexplainable circumstances she currently exists in. While I cannot doubt her beauty and the alluring embellishments with which she remains seductive daily , I have come to see her inner filth and the unsacred ugliness of her inner influences and motivators. For these reasons, I have chosen certain parameters through which I will now relate with her, and I encourage you to do the same as well every time you think of her.

ONE: ESCAPE HER. Do everything possible within your power to slide away from her powerful grip. She has a deadly hold on anyone who courts her and her words are like the piercing darts of a Yagua’s   blowgun. Do not let her beauty deceive you, for it will only sap your energy and leave you useless to even your very dreams and aspirations. This is the first law, the law of escaping the corruption that lies within her grip. For every time she lays hold on you she demands that your continence be slaughtered on the altar of impudence and imprudence. So my friend continually laying with her keeps you in a perpetual trance, and all desire and predisposition to commonsense is in sudden flight from your windows of wisdom.
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