Have you ever wondered what your life would be like without what you currently have? Some have argued that it is a futile attempt to imagine what is not since it doesn’t exist. You will at best fall into the extremities of fantasizing because of course your imaginations will be highly subjective and without the objectivity of natural occurrence. However, it will be deceptive to assume that most of us do not imagine what the other side of our lives will be like. Questions such as where would we be, if we weren’t born to our parents? Or what would we be like if we were born poor? What will I be like without my religious beliefs? Awkward still we imagine what we would be like if we were the other sex. No matter how sophisticated your thought processes, I believe you sometimes romance the idea of your counterfactuals. I daresay that there is nothing unhealthy about imagining your unknown side because your thoughts matter in the entire process. If your outcome today is a product of your thinking patterns, then your imaginations will not be far from revealing what your other side would have become even in the absence of certain influences.

I show you three areas of my life where I have totally battered my imaginations on the counterfactual. The first is my family, the second in my social status, and the third in my sex. I still have other aspects I often snack on, but these three dominate the thought series. And I give you my take on each part of the mental tripod. Certain information is not palatable for social discourse, so I will be discrete about them, other are plain riotous, and some are heinous. Yes, believe me, they are heinous and hideous. Mock me not oh my contemporaries, for in this profession I remain the least qualified. For thou my reader art excellent above all in this matter and art resplendent with the glories of vanity just like I thine little brother. I proceed…

I sometimes imagine what my life is like if I weren’t born to my parents; my father and mother, and all who stood as guardians. I imagined what language I will be speaking and what kind of character I would exude. Considering what my known background is, I sort of always imagined that I will be an absolutely unrefined animal lacking a pleasant outlook and respect for the common good. Without the discipline knocked into my head by my mum, I see myself as going totally bananas. Confessing, I have picked-pin (some of you have no idea what this means…standing on one feet and bending over with one finger touching the ground)and also knelt down with my hands up in the air all in a bid to get my product out this way. Not saying that it was what conformed me to my present image, but it sure did play a part in my knowing how serious my mother was at getting me straight. My imaginations in this regard doesn’t evoke anything positive, because I feel I am manipulative enough to have deserved the kind of ‘unmanipulative’ parent I had. My counterfactual to me would have been parent that I will sell their brains to earn myself a position in the delinquency hall of fame.

Now to my social class, which is about being rich or poor. I know being rich is a relative term, but for purposes of this discourse, you know what I mean: rich as in rich. Supposing I was born richhhhhhhh? That is richer than how I was actually born. This is what my imagination says my counterfactual would be. First I would be the most humble man on earth. I have tried to laugh it off as my actual good side influencing what my imagination produces. But believe me, I still cannot imagine how money will bloat me up (I expect to be crucified for this…no props). I have tried acting puffed up, lording over people, being oppressive, or even being callous. I just don’t succeed at that enterprise. How this I am confident of, that I will be the most sleek man on earth, my skin will glow with the like a cool shaded amber and feel velvety. I will wear customized shirts and drive customized cars. I will have a simple outlook, but smell of unattained quality. The sweet part is that I will be the greatest philanthropist in the world. I will ban poverty from the whole world and make everyone rich. I will buy my way into global influence and dictate the outcome of global politics. I will……. let me just stop there, before someone else steals my counter facts.

To complete my mental triangulation, I put on my skirt and brassiere. Beyonce sang her own counterfactual: “If I were a boy”, and symphonized on how a girl would want to be treated by a guy. But I am in no mood for a melody, as my first duty will be to create a powerful female movement responsible for cutting of that thing that has made maledom hold sway over a concept meant to be beautiful: relationships. Then we will begin to redistribute it to those males that pass our examinations based on the new definitions of manhood….ha ha ha….sound hideous uhn? But that is what I see the female me doing. On the other hand, I will so be the best woman on the face of the earth that I will give no reason for the existence of sexual exploitation, segregation, or discrimination. I will also be the best wife and most submissive to my husband, yet retaining my intelligence and building a great family and societal influence. The rest you don’t want to know.

The other aspects of my counterfactual I cannot discuss here, because I will stir the hornets’ nest and get my present fans to question my real self….lol. But I just want to let you all know that I am still under construction and not by any means near the perfect idea of a man. But I still do entertain crazy thoughts in my head and admittedly, some are just my subtle reaction to the present things I don’t like, and others are just a revelation to myself that I still have an evil nature to curb, and others are simply a reflection of the altruistic me I w ant to attain. A mixture of all these should give one a confused definition of reality. But I am eternally grateful that I am here now and me now. For what I am not, I do not cry about but work towards, being mindful of what morphing evil tendencies I may possess. The real truth is I am still amazing myself each day I live, for I am yet to think through what I can fully become outside what I presently am. I really need help.

Just a simple muse…

As I lay on the couch watching the series of events culminating in the oath taking of the new President of the United States, I flipped my mind over and over on what are the implications of this moment. Many claim that the labour of the past American heroes are now evidently not in vain, and dream of the martyr of freedom is now fully on course. Some frankly noted that along with the emotions and euphoria of an ecstatic event comes also the instructions for what lies ahead. These two married positions create a full picture of what perfect blend Obama’s day has sparked in the minds of all, despite many opposing viewpoints. I lay there caught up with the same reflections and inflections of a series of fortunate events to have befallen one man, from which today all men on the globe feed upon to cast a new plot to history and symbolisms.

Now I keep asking my self, which has a greater effect on the people. Is it the history making of the moment, or the symbolic nature of the moment that has a greater power? History reminds us of where we are coming from and sort of tells us where we are going to or ought to be going. Symbolism on the other hand captures the essence of the now, the discourse going on in the public cranium, and the effect on the events on the person. So the meditations of my heart are on the struggle between the history and the symbolism of Obama’s success today. Is ‘Obamaism’ historic or symbolic? 

I am concerned because of the different outcomes which history and symbols present us, and the effects which they play out through the responses provoked from people. While history gives us something to write and talk about, symbols give us something to act out. As I watch the young single mother and her little kid lighted up and inspired by the moment, I can feel the their intense passion to carve out a new life without recourse to the past injustices of the society. History has only given them more reasons to cry and lumber on with great desperation, but symbols have urged them with a stoking fire of inner power to lay aside the weight that easily besets and fight on for a better life. For those who recorded Martin Luther’s speech as a historic moment, they are still caught up with the issues he fought for. But for those who were drawn to the symbols of his message, they have been strengthened to alter the course of a nations history. 

Have you ever walked into a place before and something about the environment changes your attitude, without an effort? You probably have heard of the place before, but nothing changed you like being there. That is the power of symbolism. History is a story that speaks, while symbols are a emblems that influences. So to those who are inspired by the history of this time, I urge you to move from there to what the times actually mean. Look not to the words but the pictures formed by these series of cascading moments. The greatest changes in our lives have not come from a flow of events, but from what those events meant to us. So also the power of this time lies in its power to shatter mindsets and transform perspectives from bitter strongholds to sweet possibilities. 

To those who had an excuse, there suddenly is none. To those who felt weary, there is a surge of energy. To those in darkness, there arises great light. And to those caught in the tyranny of time, there presents a great door of escape. No longer are the great models for our children Entertainment Celebrities and Athletes, but a bold new definition of service and sacrifice. Suddenly we have transited from the superficial to the substantive, from the fleeting to the gripping, and from the foolish to the profound. This is the power of the symbolic nature of this moment. Evey one has something to draw from this and no one is left out. Therefore it is way beyond history, for history only tells the story from skewed spectacles. This is a symbolic moment, for its consequences are etched on every heart, and it subtly influences our very existence. But I dare say also that is also a ‘historically symbolic’ moment. I take my bite from this slice of time.

I keep asking myself the question of what informs decisions in the Nigerian leadership. Is it policy or politics? Policy obviously is rooted in an objective assessment of needs, adequately matched with existing resources to enforce changes that guarantee general welfare with minimal negative externalities. Politics on the other hand is a subject hijacked by personal or group interpretations of what and how public policy should be shaped. It’s result is usually a satisfaction of a given interest with minimum positive externalities to the welfare of the country. Time has always revealed the trajectories of politics and its implication for an evolving system like Nigeria and of all time with the examples of the last administration, we have seen how an entire nation can be systematically manipulated by the political hubris of a highly opinionated few with no substantiated national plan of action. Now we are at the verge of being subjected to another jungle system of decision making that makes our beloved country a blatant mockery in the international system.

It is very interesting how the leadership of Nigeria has just picked certain Ministers at the same time when the revered President Elect of the US is making his cabinet choices. I cannot but juxtapose the two events and compare the quality of choices made by both leaders. I will not get into the nitty gritty of the process, because the output tells the input and processes that go into decision making. The day you see mango fruits growing on on a tree with orange leaves, then there should be much concerns. But till when we see such a tweak, you only know a tree by the fruit it bears, and the choices we have seen in this Nigerian cabinet, tells us of the quality of thinking that went into the mechanism of selecting the cabinet. While I am in no way castigating the government for the quality of its choices, as I believe they must be capable in one form or the other, I want to strongly raise an issue regarding the appointment of Dora Akunyili as Minister for Information and Communications.

When I look through Obama’s choices for his cabinet members, I rarely can find an overt political influence in those selected. These men are proven and certified leaders in the field they have been chosen to operate in. Consider his choice of Steven Chu, a respected Nobel prize winner in Physics, to be his Energy Secretary. Doesn’t that tell you of his sincerity to move that aspect of his economy forward. Behold Dora! Catapulted from Keeping our Drugs and Food safe to being the spokesperson and image launderer for the country. The whole world knew of Dora when she served in assigned duty successfully, backed with a thorough understanding of what her assignment was, being a Pharmacist. Now we have carried a Pharmacist and given her the role of a Public Relations expert and we expect that she will function with the exact creativity and innovation she dispersed in her former dominion? Absolutely foolhardy. While I do not doubt her intelligence and ability to adapt to any role she is assigned, I dare to say that we have shortchanged our national destiny by denying her the role of the Minister of Health. 

Today the Nigerian Union of Journalists rejected the appointment of the poor woman claiming that it is a show of “the usual disdain with which politicians perceive the media.” I am expecting the National Assembly of Nigeria to turn down this appointment and the other mismatches and do the right thing, based on the recommendations of well meaning citizens. In the 21st century we are still plugging in round in round pegs in square holes and hoping the round peg will assume the shape of its host. Ridiculous! In any case, I expect Dora herself to be sensible and be wise by turning down anything that will take the shine of her escutcheon. She has a worthy example in Okonjo-Iweala who threw in her towel after the Obasanjo administration tried to frustrate her by flinging her into the External Affairs Ministry. 

Dora is not the only one ohhh!! Let me show you a few more. Shettima Mustapha, an Agronomist is made Minister of Defence. To do what, grow Missiles? Nuhu Somo Way, an Architect now Minister of State for Power. To do what, design Power Plants? Ibrahim Bio, a trained Pharmacist is Minister of State for Transport. To do what, prescribe drugs to out vehicles? I am feeling tired already going through all this. When is our country going to put aside politics and let policy be the reason for taking decisions. Our institutions are failing for lack of effective leadership to steer the wheels. We all saw what this can produce when Dora did what she knows best. We saw what Duke did with tourism, yet we don’t know if the man with the most ambitious tourism project, for which he was largely successful, was ever contacted to handle the Tourism Ministry. We are tired of being used as experimental pigs in the laboratory of party crassness. I remain of the opinion that we need to unclothe Nigeria, give her a thorough bath before we choose what to clothe her with. As for some of these present national designers, they have run out of ideas, if they ever had one.

And come to think of it. The office of Information and Communication requires that the holder possess some level of oratory finesse and diplomacy in conversation. I have heard Dora speak and reason and admire her intelligence, but for the above….. all I can say is… hmmmmmmm!!!